


I Can’t Risk Falling Off My Throne

by buggettebuggington



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Blam, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, dalton sam, little miss perfect au, seblaine if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 05:47:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26966953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buggettebuggington/pseuds/buggettebuggington
Summary: Blaine Anderson Little Miss Perfect au.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sam Evans
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	I Can’t Risk Falling Off My Throne

**Author's Note:**

> Based off of the song Little Miss Perfect by Joriah Kwamé (performed by Taylor Louderman) the title is also from that song. I’d like to remind you once again that I have little to no writing experience and wrote this all at one am because I was bored, so hope you like it :)

“Just blend in.” I tell myself. “It’s not that hard.” It’s a reassurance I’ve given myself everyday since fifth grade, the year I realized I wasn’t like everyone else. Ever since then all I’ve wanted to do is be normal, and even more than that, I just want to make my parents happy. I just want to be the perfect kid, like my brother. So, that’s why I keep my grades up, participate in every possible club, am president of the student council and keep my unruly hair gelled back. To impress them, because otherwise I risk not being as good as my more successful, talented, straight brother. 

I am unbelievably spoiled by my parents. They send me to a fancy, all boys boarding school, where the tuition costs more than I could say, (they straight up comped me 60k) they buy me a ton of very expensive clothing, and even send me and a friend of my choice to Paris every summer. I should be grateful. I should pay them back by being the perfect son.

I am constantly exhausted. I’ve never done anything that normal teenagers do, like drink, listen to loud music, or even have sex. The only thing that keeps me happy is my best friend Sam. He’s always there for me, and he’s just a genuinely caring guy. He and I read comic books, and occasionally play video games together, just like the perfect all American teens we should be.

Walking through the hallways at Dalton is the same way it always is. I keep my head down, and just walk straight ahead, until I meet Sam at my locker. When I get there though, a boy with brown hair and a sly grin passes me. I haven’t noticed him before, but I’m immediately drawn in. I open my mouth to speak to him, but then I remember not to let my guard down. I’m being selfish. I don’t even understand love, it’s not something I need.

I meet Sam and we head to my place. He’s always been super chill about my parents having a lot of money, even though he’s been homeless before. He knows what it’s like to be judged for what your parents have or don’t have. 

We decide to treat ourselves and order some pizza, while we read some comic books. Soon enough we’re rolling on the floor laughing at nothing. That night, I felt closer to him than I ever had in my while. Not in a romantic way though, strictly platonic. 

My eyes were drawn to his mouth. He was known for having pretty full lips, even coining the nickname “Trouty Mouth”. Every time he smiled it felt like time slowed down a bit. He would sip his drink, or do one of his stupid impressions and I couldn’t speak. He just had this energy that drew me and others in.

“I like your hair.” He told me. “I’ve never seen it without gel before.” I let out a nervous laugh.   
“Dude it’s like so curly, can I touch it?” He asked.

“S-sure” I choked out, completely shocked.   
“Sam Evans wants to touch my hair?” I thought in disbelief.

He continued to play with it for a while, telling me he was gonna put it in pigtails. I just giggled, slowly blacking out. This couldn’t be real, it just couldn’t.

“Ok, wanna see the final product?” He asked. “I’ve had some practice doing Stacy’s hair, so I’m not complete shit at it, I promise.” 

I got up to look in the mirror.   
“Oh lord Sam, I look like a space alien.” I laughed. We both lost it in a fit of loud obnoxious laughter, and then all of a sudden it just stopped.

We sat there on the bed staring at each other. He was giving me that look. The one that the characters always do before they go in for a kiss. I’m frozen with fear. All I can do is stare into his pretty blue irises, hoping for something to happen. Next thing you know we’re leaning in, and his lips are on mine. I feel like I’m on a roller coaster. 

Last time I checked, Sam was the straightest guy out there. Sure, he didn’t look it, but every time it was brought up, he always denied being anything but it. He denied it in such a calm, collected manner that he couldn’t be lying.

The kiss deepened and started to get hungrier. I couldn’t breathe. There was no way this was happening right now. 

I finally break the kiss to catch my breath, and that’s when I see it. My dad. My fucking dad, in the window, jaw on the floor and steam practically pouring out his ears. No. No, please no this isn’t happening, I’m just imagining it. I close my eyes and take deep breaths.

“Sam, you have to go.” I said.

“Did I do something?” He looked confused and hurt.

“I said to get out. Now.” Sam swung his bag over his left arm. I saw him holding back tears. It’s my fault. I did that to him. I resist the urge to cry for now, while I deal with dad. 

He looked mad, really mad.   
“Blaine Devon Anderson. What in God’s name is my son doing kissing a boy.” He said, as if it was something foul he’d just been forced to eat.

“Dad, it’s not what you think, I promise.” I told him. “Sam has a show on Saturday where he has to kiss this senior girl, so we were practicing a stage kiss. It’s not real, it’s just meant to look real. I was just teaching him, that’s all.”

“It better be fucking all.” He said, and then left. I let out a sigh of relief. I can’t keep doing this. I need to talk to Sam.

I come up to him the next day at school.   
“Hey Sam, can we talk?” I ask.

“That’s perfect because I meant to talk to you to.” He replied, putting on what looked like a real smile. “About last night, it was surely just a mistake, I mean we weren’t thinking, and I’m sorry if things got out of hand. We’re both straight and I guess we just haven’t had girlfriends in a while.”

“Y-yeah totally.” I nodded, my heart sank. It wasn’t what I had hoped to hear. As I headed to the washroom I couldn’t believe how stupid I’d been. I knew it was too good to be true.

I sat in the washroom stall and cried. I’ll never find real love. This isn’t fair. I can’t ruin my reputation for this. It’s not worth it. It’s never worth it, when you’re the perfect son, the perfect student, the perfect friend. I was selfish and stupid and now look where that’s got me. I wish I was more like my brother, and not the utter waste of time that I actually am. One day, someone’s gonna pull of that mask and realize I’m a fraud, and that I’m not good enough. I just I wish I was good enough.


End file.
